To Sugar Or Not To Sugar. That is the Question.

So, since what I'm going to tell you that what I do for my lawn, is an argument debated by gardeners from time immortal, you still might want to give this a try. But, if you do, don't go overboard until you see how it works for you. It works for me. Gonna tell you about my magical microbe amendment. But honestly, it's just science-no magic. Biochemically it works and I'll tell you why! To sugar or not to sugar-that is the question? No doubt if Shakespeare had written this soliloquy, we would have never heard of him or Hamlet. However, since I'm not Shakespeare and you aren't Hamlet, we appear to be somewhat safe for now. So, let's get started.

Throw some sugar and some fertilizer on your lawn and put some water on it. The soil microbes that are already there will love you for it. Unless you live on a nuclear or chemical dump site (which if you do you have more problems than worrying about a lawn), the critters that are already there are ready to "eat" and multiply. It's their "home", they already live there. They just need some dessert to get fat and sassy. You don't need to add any fancy expensive "critters "from some foreign land that someone would love to sell you at an astronomical price. What keeps microbes that inhabit your place from breaking down stuff to goodness is the key to solving a riddle So, instead of working so hard to de-thatch or vacuum our grass clipping goodness that we bag and dump, and bag and dump...if your lawn looks crappy, why not try another approach. These magical microbe creatures need 1) an energy source (carbohydrate-sugar) 2) a nitrogen source (some kinda fertilizer) and 3) organic stuff for microbes to munch (like grass clipping or leaves). So, this will happen slowly anyway if you don't do anything. But you can speed the process to warp speed in nature's way of happening. That's where it gets a little tricky. First of all, don't leave enough leaf or clippings on the lawn to smother your grass. Mulch them. And mow often to keep clippings short and manageable. Chop them up. Second, don't expect instant gratification. It's a long term "seems like forever" building project. I just wanna pull what little old coot hair I have left out when I see a "university agricultural study" with a conclusion of "we added sugar to part of a corn crop and did not notice a significant increase of corn production in the sugared area." Duh??? First of all, the sugar and fertilizer will aid the microbes to multiply astronomically. But the other thing is, it must have organic matter for the microbes to "eat". By eat I mean break down and use in their reproductive process to rapidly multiply. Did they have all that? Maybe not. Most likely not. What will be left if they do? Goodness. Not only nutrients from what is broken down from the organic matter but just as importantly and maybe more-so, wonderful oxygenated "broken" minuscule sized dead microbe nutrients.

I was running an environmental laboratory and did some "fancy machine" tests for a college professor friend. The project was to find out what was left in the soil after critters had broken down oil contaminated soil. He comes to me and says in disbelief, "Hey Jack these results can't be right, these are oxygenated life compounds". I'm like "Sure are, think about it, it's what's left from broken microbes." He says, "Well I'll be darned, you are right." I said, "Not only has oil been broken down to allow plants to come back, but they have some nutrients in the soil to help them get started." He just smiles and says, "I taught you well." So how much sugar do you use and when? Well for my part I just get me a few pounds when it goes on sale and run through the yard throwing it in the air and yelling yippee when rain or a rare snowfall is in the forecast. (Disclaimer: if someone is dumb enough to do this when lightening or any weather threat is anywhere around, you have been forewarned-don't do it). Some sugar is better than none but too much will slightly raise soil temperatures from microbes growing-so not too much. Think my throw in air and let it float to ground yippee approach works as well as any. Winter is a great time when insects aren't out and grass isn't growing, but summer is ok too. Anytime when you are going to be sure and get some impending rain. And for all the corn raising agricultural people out there. It takes a while to get from lifeless material to microbe breakdown to roots of plants. So, give it time. Look long term. Not instant gratification as we are so prone to do. Meanwhile--HAPPY GARDENING and have some innovative fun!